International Café

[Nain]

Re: I'm always stylish lovely bird

Let's wake the people up!!

Be specific on requirements!!!

A woman goes to Italy to attend a 2-week, company training session.
Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.
The wife answers : "Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring foryou?"
The husband laughs and says: "An Italian girl !!!"
The woman kept quiet and left.
Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks: "So, honey, how was the trip?"
"Very good, thank you." "And, what happened to my present?"
"Which present?" She asked.
"The one I asked for - an Italian girl!!"
"Oh, that" she said
"Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait for few months to see if it is a girl!!!"
Be specific on requirements!!!

This is good.:lol::lol:

 

[Amigos4]

Re: I'm always stylish lovely bird

Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney.

"Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!"

"Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney "Where are ye callin' from?"

 

[Amigos4]

Re: I'm always stylish lovely bird

Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary.

He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Flynn sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.

He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.

In the morning, Flynn woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Mary staring at him from across the room.

She said, "You were drunk again last night weren't you?"

Flynn said, "Why you say such a mean thing?"

"Well," Mary said, "it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly....it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.

 

[Anglika]

Yesterday one of the Chosen Ones (my least interested student that is) kindly informed me he'd fathered a child,giving me one of those full-of-himself looks,daring me to give him a piece of my mind
which (I'm not proud of myself here) made me say "I do hope you didn't pass on your brain to that poor imp"

A leaf out of George Bernard Shaw: next time , try asking "Has the child inherited his/her mother's good looks or your brains?" and watch him trying to work out if there is a compliment or not.

 

[Bunjamin]

[FONT=&quot]I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another girl with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Hah, It's a very good allegation, isn't it ? I've taken it from a romantic movie called "The NoteBook"
[/FONT]

 

[Amigos4]

[FONT=&quot]I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another girl with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Hah, It's a very good allegation, isn't it ? I've taken it from a romantic movie called "The NoteBook" [/FONT][FONT=&quot][/FONT]

Hi, Bunjamin! Welcome to the Cafe!

Have you seen 'The Notebook' on DVD? It is a very good film!

As a 'common man', do you think you will ever do something special so others can honor you with a monument?

 

[Amigos4]

Where the devil is Heidita these days???? She must be quite busy to be so forgetful of her adoring friends in the Cafe!!!

 

[Bunjamin]

Hi, Bunjamin! Welcome to the Cafe!

Have you seen 'The Notebook' on DVD? It is a very good film!

As a 'common man', do you think you will ever do something special so others can honor you with a monument?

First of all, thanks for being kind
And yeah i have been watching "The Notebook" on DVD too, and indeed it's a very romantic and lovely movie, but as for the next time I would rather try to watch it with a girl friend
Well, Me as a "common man", hmmm, i don't think so that i will ever do something special that will makes others build me a monument, but I think that the most important thing that keeps a person in someone else's life memories is "The respect, good deeds and the sincerity you have had"

 

[Amigos4]

First of all, thanks for being kind You're welcome! Thank you for thanking me!!!
And yeah i have been watching "The Notebook" on DVD too, and indeed it's a very romantic and lovely movie, but as for the next time I would rather try to watch it with a girl friend
Well, Me as a "common man", hmmm, i don't think so that i will ever do something special that will makes others build me a monument, but I think that the most important thing that keeps a person in someone else's life memories is "The respect, good deeds and the sincerity you have had"

If you had to pick one individual that you believe respects you for your 'good deeds and sincerity', who would that individual be?

 

[Bunjamin]

If you had to pick one individual that you believe respects you for your 'good deeds and sincerity', who would that individual be?

Hm, Well, I can't exactly decide about that individual nowadays as i am still a teenager and I doubt people that are older than me would care or either support me with the things i mentioned above they simply don't care.
But i think that the individuals that might be able to respect me for my "good deeds and sincerity" are those who already faced it with me ;-)
And i must also add that, God loves people that do good deeds.

 

[Bunjamin]

It's already time to go and sleep in my country, i am now quitting from here and I hope that we will talk tomorrow again.

Good Night and Enjoy UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum

 

[Amigos4]

It's already time to go and sleep in my country, i am now quitting from here and I hope that we will talk tomorrow again.

Good Night and Enjoy UsingEnglish.com ESL Forum

Good night, Bunjamin! Sweet dreams, my young friend!

Cheers,
Amigo

 

[Amigos4]

But i think that the individuals that might be able to respect me for my "good deeds and sincerity" are those who already faced it with me ;-)
And i must also add that, God loves people that do good deeds.

Nicely stated, Bunjamin: 'God loves people that do good deeds.' You are a very mature young man and I am confident that someday you will have a monument named after you! :up:

 

[shalstudent]

What do we do today?? This place seems deserted!!
Has the March heat taken over people or am I just late?

 

[Amigos4]

What do we do today?? This place seems deserted!!
Has the March heat taken over people or am I just late?

All of the wild women and rowdy men appear to be resting for the weekend! Where are Bea, Heidita, Nain, DT, P., and the others when we really need them to party?

 

[shalstudent]

Just had to share this with you all. Its Hialrious!!!!

Legal Logical & Neither
After having failed his exam in 'Logistics and Organization', a student
goes and confronts his lecturer about it.
Student: 'Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?'
Professor: 'Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!'

Student: 'Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you
can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If
you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an 'A' for the
exam'
Professor: 'Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?'

Student: 'What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and
neither logical, nor legal?'

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give
the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an 'A',
as agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the
same question.

He immediately answers: 'Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 25
year old woman, which is legal, but not logical.
Your wife has a 16 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal.
The fact that you have given your wife's lover an 'A', although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical.'

 

[Nain]

:lol:

 

[proof.beh]

Just had to share this with you all. Its Hialrious!!!!

Legal Logical & Neither
After having failed his exam in 'Logistics and Organization', a student
goes and confronts his lecturer about it.
Student: 'Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?'
Professor: 'Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!'

Student: 'Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you
can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If
you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an 'A' for the
exam'
Professor: 'Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?'

Student: 'What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and
neither logical, nor legal?'

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give
the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an 'A',
as agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the
same question.

He immediately answers: 'Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 25
year old woman, which is legal, but not logical.
Your wife has a 16 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal.
The fact that you have given your wife's lover an 'A', although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical.'

Hilarious!:roll::lol:

 

[shalstudent]

Why the rolling eyes, P?

 

[proof.beh]

Why the rolling eyes, P?

Because I still am in a doubt it was really hilarious, however, made me to smile!