sunshade

[Do228]

An attractive young woman is lying on the beach on a sunny day. Which version do you think sounded better?

Bella seniorita, may I offer you to ly under my sunshade? Your flawless skin must not get a sun burn.
Bella seniorita, would you mind lying under my sunshade to prevent your flawless skin from getting burned?
Bella seniorita, is it OK for you if I place my sunshade above you to avoid your flawless skin getting a sun burn?

 

[GoesStation]

Whichever one you use, if she knows Romance languages at all, the beautiful young woman is going to wonder why you forgot whether you were speaking Italian or Spanish right in the middle of your pick-up line.

 

[jutfrank]

The beautiful young woman may well think to herself: "What kind of idiota is this? Does this man, guapo though he may be, not realise that I am wearing the bronzing lotion, and that having the direct exposure to the sun is precisely what I am here to do?", in which case they all sound equally stupid.

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

An attractive young woman is lying on the beach on a sunny day. Which version do you think sounded better?

Bella seniorita, may I invite you to lie under my sunshade? Your flawless skin must not get a sunburn.
Bella seniorita, would you mind lying under my sunshade to prevent your flawless skin from getting burned?
Bella seniorita, is it OK for you if I place my sunshade above you to avoid your flawless skin getting a sunburn?

They all sound sleezy, creepy, intrusive, and rude. Maybe it's different outside the US. (I hope not!)

 

[Do228]

But why is it rude, etc.? In my opinion, it shows that you're polite and that you care about her and offer help and even make a nice compliment.

 

[Yankee]

They are some of the worst pick-up lines ever.

 

[probus]

Whichever one you use, if she knows Romance languages at all, the beautiful young woman is going to wonder why you forgot whether you were speaking Italian or Spanish right in the middle of your pick-up line.

Nah.

A girl who is dumb enough to be impressed by a European accent spiced with slightly bad grammar would never notice that:-D

 

[Disckstuckinfan]

I think it should be señorita.

 

[Skrej]

Your whole approach is based on the premise that she wouldn't want to "damage" her skin. However, if she's sunbathing, then she most likely is wanting to tan and thus wouldn't be interested in shade.

A more logical approach (although equally as slimy and cheesy) would be to offer to apply lotion. Even though she's sunbathing, she'll still likely be wearing some kind of sunscreen or tanning oil, etc. You'll still get some variety of "buzz off creep" reaction, but at least in makes more sense contextually.

Offer to trace your number on her skin in sunscreen so she can't forget it. That appears to be about the same level of crassness you're looking for.

 

[GoesStation]

Offer to trace your number on her skin in sunscreen so she can't forget it. That appears to be about the same level of crassness you're looking for.

:up: Write "Mein numéro" with it to give it that Continental appeal.

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

But why is it rude, etc.? In my opinion, it shows that you're polite and that you care about her and offer help and even make a nice compliment.

As Yankee said, they're all bad pick-up lines. Phrases like Bella seniorita and flawless skin signal that you're hitting on her, and it's not polite to hit on strangers.

 

[Tdol]

Number 2 suggests you have some sort of right to expect her to do this. They're all bad, but this one is a bit sinister. A ticket inspector can ask if I wouldn't mind showing my ticket, and that is simply a polite way of telling me to show my ticket.

 

[Do228]

Nah.

A girl who is dumb enough to be impressed by a European accent spiced with slightly bad grammar would never notice that:-D

Why "dumb enough"? What's so wrong about speaking with a European accent?

 

[probus]

There is nothing at all wrong with speaking with a European accent, or with any accent so long as it's not so thick that the speech is unintelligible.

 

[GoesStation]

Why "dumb enough"? What's so wrong about speaking with a European accent?

It's being impressed by it which is dumb. Some people speak with a foreign accent; some such accents are attractive to many native speakers; being overly impressed by the fact that someone happens to speak with such an accent is dumb.

 

[probus]

a foreign accent; some such accents are attractive to many native speakers

Sure. Jamaican, Irish, and Scottish accents charm me, probably because I can't do them well.