official letter needs correction

[zead]

To whom it may concern​

This is to certify that Mr. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx has graduated from the Electrical Engineering Department in the Faculty of Engineering, Denver Univesity (Derna Campus), and been awarded B.Sc. in Electrical Engineering. This is also to confirm that ***the primary language of the Electrical Engineering program in Derna Campus is English.

This letter has been issued upon the request of the above-named for whatever legal purpose it may serve.



Registrar of Faculty of Engineering or Faculty of Engineering Registrar
kieth George

 

[teechar]

I would expect the admin/academic staff at Denver University to be competent speakers of English! ;-)

 

[tedmc]

Isn't it necessary to state the year the person graduated?

What is the purpose of the sentence in the second paragraph?

I think the name of the registrar should go before the designation and should be in capital letters.

 

[emsr2d2]

To whom it may concern:

This is to certify that Mr.xxxxx [STRIKE]has[/STRIKE] graduated in [year] from the Electrical Engineering Department in the Faculty of Engineering, Denver University (Derna Campus), and [STRIKE]been[/STRIKE] was awarded a B.Sc. in Electrical Engineering.

This is also to confirm that *** (why are these asterisks here?) the primary language of the Electrical Engineering program [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] on Derna Campus is English.

This letter has been issued upon the request of the above-named for whatever legal purpose it may serve.

[STRIKE]kieth[/STRIKE] [I imagine his name is actually] Keith George
Registrar of Faculty of Engineering or Faculty of Engineering Registrar

See above.