noodle factory

[Do228]

Is this text well-formulated or should it be changed?

Manfredo had impregnated several women last year and spent all his money for a grossly overpriced motorbike because he was too drunk to realize that the bike dealer, who had gotten Manfredo sloshed with lychee wine, was a real sawy bamboozler. Consequently, Manfredo had absolutely no more money left to buy enough food for all the hungry little babies. Thanks to a lucky twist of fate, one of his best friends, who works as a foreman in a noodle factory, somehow managed to salt 3000kg of spaghettis away in an unobserved moment, risking his job for the good purpose, and delivered them to Manfredo's estate with the company truck, where they repacked the spaghettis to portions handy enough to be conveyed on the motorbike. For the babies don't have any teeth yet, it's the mothers who from now on must eat spaghettis almost every day and convert them into mother's milk, which then will be used for feeding the babies and saving Manfredo's progeny. On the one hand, they would certainly prefer having a diet richer in diversity, but on the other hand they are real happy and grateful knowing that Manfredo and his buddy found a way to put the kibosh on the days of hunger and despair.

 

[emsr2d2]

Is this text well-formulated or should it be changed?

Manfredo had impregnated several women last year and spent all his money for a grossly overpriced motorbike because he was too drunk to realize that the bike dealer, who had gotten Manfredo sloshed with lychee wine, was a real sawy bamboozler. Consequently, Manfredo had absolutely no more money left to buy enough food for all the hungry little babies. Thanks to a lucky twist of fate, one of his best friends, who works as a foreman in a noodle factory, somehow managed to salt 3000kg of spaghettis away in an unobserved moment, risking his job for the good purpose, and delivered them to Manfredo's estate with the company truck, where they repacked the spaghettis to portions handy enough to be conveyed on the motorbike. For the babies don't have any teeth yet, it's the mothers who from now on must eat spaghettis almost every day and convert them into mother's milk, which then will be used for feeding the babies and saving Manfredo's progeny. On the one hand, they would certainly prefer having a diet richer in diversity, but on the other hand they are real happy and grateful knowing that Manfredo and his buddy found a way to put the kibosh on the days of hunger and despair.

It's a very bizarre paragraph all round. To start with, please look at the two words I have marked in red. The first isn't a word at all. The second doesn't make sense.

 

[Yankee]

I think "sawy" was intended to be "savy" which would mean someone who knew how to be a "bamboozler", and to "salt.....away" in AmE means to store, save or keep.

 

[emsr2d2]

I wasn't away of "salt away". In BrE, "savy" is usually spelt "savvy". That might explain "sawy". Perhaps the OP saw "savvy" and thought that the "v" and "v" were a "w".

 

[Do228]

It's a very bizarre paragraph all round. To start with, please look at the two words I have marked in red. The first isn't a word at all. The second doesn't make sense.

So, do you think there are more mistakes or what do you mean by "to start with"?

Yes, "sawy" was indeed a typo and intended to mean "savy".

 

[emsr2d2]

Is this text well-formulated or should it be changed?

Manfredo [STRIKE]had impregnated[/STRIKE] got several women pregnant last year [STRIKE]and[/STRIKE] but spent all his money [STRIKE]for[/STRIKE] on a grossly overpriced motorbike because he was too drunk to realize that the bike dealer, who had gotten ("got" in BrE) Manfredo sloshed ("drunk" in BrE) [STRIKE]with[/STRIKE] on lychee wine, was a real savvy bamboozler.

Consequently, Manfredo had absolutely no [STRIKE]more[/STRIKE] money left to buy [STRIKE]enough[/STRIKE] food for all the hungry little babies. Thanks to a lucky twist of fate, one of his best friends, who works as a foreman in a noodle factory, somehow managed to salt away 3000kg of [STRIKE]spaghettis[/STRIKE] spaghetti [STRIKE]away[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]in an unobserved moment[/STRIKE], risking his job for the better good [STRIKE]purpose[/STRIKE]. [STRIKE]and[/STRIKE] He delivered them to Manfredo's estate (that seems unlikely - do you just mean "house"?) [STRIKE]with[/STRIKE] in the company truck, where they repacked the [STRIKE]spaghettis[/STRIKE] spaghetti into portions [STRIKE]handy[/STRIKE] small enough to be [STRIKE]conveyed[/STRIKE] carried on the motorbike.

[STRIKE]For[/STRIKE] Because the babies don't have any teeth yet, it's the mothers who [STRIKE]from now on[/STRIKE] must eat [STRIKE]spaghettis[/STRIKE] spaghetti almost every day and convert [STRIKE]them[/STRIKE] it into [STRIKE]mother's[/STRIKE] [breast] milk [STRIKE], which then will be use[/STRIKE]d for [STRIKE]feeding[/STRIKE] the babies, [STRIKE]and[/STRIKE] thereby saving Manfredo's progeny.

On the one hand, they would certainly prefer [STRIKE]having[/STRIKE] a diet richer in diversity, but on the other hand they are really happy and grateful [STRIKE]knowing[/STRIKE] that Manfredo and his buddy found a way to put the kibosh on (this is a commonly used phrase but it doesn't work here) their days of hunger and despair.

See above.

Note that in the UK, noodles and spaghetti are not the same thing. If his friend works in a place where they make spaghetti, he works in a pasta factory. If he works in a noodle factory, he makes noodles.