Introduction on Me (Your corrections and comments , please !)

[HL_Learner]

My name is Ali, and I am twenty seven years old. I live in Abha, Saudi Arabia. I graduated with a bachelor's degree in Computer Science from Abha University on June 19, 2011. I trained for six months at DWDR company. I worked for one year at Abha high school as a teacher of computer. I am now a teaching assistant in the Department of Information Systems, College of Computer Science, Abha University, since April 1st, 2014.


(Is this paragraph suitable to be an intro of an essay on myself ?)

 

[Tarheel]

My name is Ali, and I am twenty seven years old. I live in Abha, Saudi Arabia. I graduated with a bachelor's degree in computer science from Abha University on June 19, 2011. I trained for six months at DWDR company. I worked for one year at Abha high school as a teacher of computer science. I am now a teaching assistant in the Department of Information Systems, College of Computer Science, Abha University, since April 1st, 2014.


(Is this paragraph suitable to be an intro of an essay on myself ?)

Yes, it's fine. (The term "computer science" should not be capitalized except when it is a proper noun.)

:up: