Help needed: Please proofread!

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nelle13

New member
Joined
Feb 12, 2012
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
German
Home Country
Germany
Current Location
Germany
Dear teachers,
could anyone please proofread the email below (and especially check for grammar and spelling errors). :)
This is an email to the company I will be seconded to introducing myself and clarifying some details. I will be provided with an appartement and I need to know the move-in date in order to book my flight.

Dear ...,


XXX, from the Office of (name of my company), gave me your email adress. She told me that you would be my contact person in XXX.
My name is XXX. I am currently working as a trainee for XXX. As part of my training I am given the opportunity to be seconded to XXX from XXX to XXX.
First of all, I would like to thank you for sending the documents required by XXX and for organising the accommodation in XXX.

I also have a few questions that I hope you can help me with.

I was told to book the flight to XXX as soon as possible. I understand that accommodation will not be allocated until the end of (XXX month). However, I wonder, if you could tell me on what date exactly the appartment will be available.

Another Trainee, XXX will complete her training in the office of XXX at the same time. As we are close friends, we would appreciate very much to either share an appartement or live close by each other, if possible.

Please do not hesitate to contact me if you have any further questions. I am very much looking forward to meeting you XXX.


With kind regards
 
You have misspelt "apartment" and you have "split the infinitive" with: "to either share". This should be "either to share".

Mind you, your English is much better than that of most native English speakers, who would also have made these mistakes and more!
 
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