Diary - When my friend Jenny was a child

[Maybo]

This is an entry from my diary. Please check it and correct any mistakes.

When my friend Jenny was a child, her family went on vacation to Thailand. After they settled everything at the hotel, she took a nap and her mum sat next to her. Suddenly, a head stuck out from a mirror looking around the room. It had two long pointy ears! I asked my friend shockingly, "Was that an elf?" She answered, "Maybe. Kind of." Jenny's mum was eager to protect her child so she glared at the creature. It noticed her and was scared. In a split second, it jumped into the mirror in the bathroom. Mirror is said to be a channel for spirits. Now, it seems that there are more universes in it! Maybe a world of fairytales? Since I heard the story, I've been covering my mirrors while not in use.

 

[emsr2d2]

When my friend Jenny was a child, she her family went on vacation to Thailand with her family. After they settled everything at settling in to their hotel room, she took a nap and while her mum sat next to her. Suddenly, a head with two long pointy ears stuck out from through a mirror looking and looked around the room. It had two long pointy ears!

Logic problem - if Jenny was asleep, how did she see the head?
Note my changes in the final sentence of this part. It makes sense to put all the descriptive parts of the head together.
Writing "stuck out from a mirror looking around the room" means that the mirror was looking round the room.

Jenny's mum was eager to protect her child so she glared at the creature. It noticed her and was scared off. In a split second, it jumped into the mirror in the bathroom.

Shocked, I asked my friend Jenny shockingly, "Was that it an elf?" She answered, "Maybe. Kind of."

You need to make it clear that you asked the question after she'd finished telling the story. If you interrupted her story with this question, you can put this part back where it was but you then need to add something after to make it clear that you're continuing with what Jenny told you.

Mirrors is are said to be a channel for spirits. Now, it seems that there are more universes in it! Maybe a world of fairytales?

I don't understand the two underlined sentences. Try to express your idea in a different way.

Since I heard the story, I've been covering my mirrors while when they're not in use.

 

[Tarheel]

This is getting weird.

@Maybo, do you believe everything your friend tells you?

 

[Maybo]

Logic problem - if Jenny was asleep, how did she see the head?

Jenny was asleep. Her mum sat next to her and didn’t sleep. Her mum saw the head.

I don't understand the two underlined sentences. Try to express your idea in a different way.

I used to thought that only spirits like ghosts would passed through mirrors. And now there are elves, which I thought they were fabricated. Maybe there are some more creatures we don’t know using mirrors as a channel and they live in different universes in this world. “Now, it seems that there are more universes in mirrors. Maybe there is a world of fairytales in the mirror.”

 

[Maybo]

This is getting weird.

@Maybo, do you believe everything your friend tells you?

I will answer this question after I’ve told all the stories. Very soon.

 

[Tarheel]

Jenny was asleep. Her mum sat next to her and didn’t sleep. Her mum saw the head.


I used to THINK that only spirits like ghosts COULD PASS through mirrors. And now there are elves, which I thought they were fabricated. Maybe there are some OTHER creatures we don’t know using mirrors as a channel and they live in different universes in this world. “Now, it seems that there are more universes in mirrors. Maybe there is a world of fairytales in the mirror.”

Some people have very active imaginations.

 

[Maybo]

Some people have very active imaginations.

I forgot to mention that my friend’s brother can also see ghost.

 

[emsr2d2]

Jenny was asleep. Her mum sat next to her and didn’t sleep. Her mum saw the head.

In that case, when Jenny related the story to you, she should have made it clear that she was telling you what her mum told her happened. The way you've worded it makes it sound as if Jenny claims she saw it herself.

I used to thought think that only spirits like ghosts would passed could pass through mirrors. And Now there are elves, which I thought they were fabricated made-up/mythical/fictional. Maybe there are some more creatures we don’t know about using mirrors as a channel and they live in different universes in this world.

Are you saying that you're fine with believing that ghosts exist but you're questioning the existence of elves?

 

[Tarheel]

I forgot to mention that my friend’s brother can also see THE ghost.

 

[Maybo]

Are you saying that you're fine with believing that ghosts exist but you're questioning the existence of elves?

Um… I focus more on mirrors. I thought only ghosts would use a mirror as a channel (based on some horror movies). I never thought elves would use it too. Whether I believe it exists or not, I haven’t seen them appear in the mirror in the movies.

 

[Tarheel]

Um… I focus more on mirrors. I thought only ghosts would use a mirror as a channel (based on some horror movies). I never thought elves COULD use THEM too. Whether I believe it exists or not, I haven’t seen them appear in the mirror in the movies.

You do know that those movies are works of fiction, don't you?

 

[Maybo]

You do know that those movies are works of fiction, don't you?

Yes.