Diary entry - My home has a few geckos.

[Maybo]

This is an entry from my diary. Please check it and correct any mistakes.

My home has a few geckos. I'm very scared of them because they run very fast and appear out of nowhere. Once, a gecko hid in my stationery box. When My hand touched inside the box, it shook madly. It scared me to death. The moment definitely was as frightening as the scene in The Exorcist - the possessed girl bent backwards down the stairs. At night, the geckos make noises, sometimes in the living room and sometimes in my room. The sound is like "coooo, coooo". When I turn on the light, they are quieter. Summer is coming. I believe they will appear more often to eat insects in my home.

 

[emsr2d2]

Your house doesn't have geckos. You could start with something like "There are a few geckos [that live] in my house" or "I've seen a few geckos in my house".

 

[Tarheel]

Try:

When I reached inside the box I was startled by the gecko that was inside.

(You probably scared it.)

 

[probus]

I don't see anything wrong with "My home has a few geckos."

 

[Tarheel]

They eat bugs.

 

[tedmc]

I don't see anything wrong with "My home has a few geckos."

The geckos are not a fixture in the house. They don't belong there.

 

[Tarheel]

The geckos are not a fixture in the house. They don't belong there.

He doesn't mean the geckos belong there. (They think they do.) He means that expression.

 

[tedmc]

Try:

When I reached inside the box I was startled by the gecko that was inside.

(You probably scared it.)

Be more descriptive:

When my hand reached inside the box, I felt something something cold and squirming. It scared the daylights out of me.

I had a similar experience once with a frog hiding inside my shoe. When I slid my foot inside, I felt my toes coming into contact with something soft like jelly and was moving.

 

[Maybo]

Be more descriptive:

When my hand reached inside the box, I felt something something cold and squirming. It scared the daylights out of me.

I had a similar experience once with a frog hiding inside my shoe. When I slid my foot inside, I felt my toes coming into contact with something soft like jelly and was moving.

I didn’t touch the gecko. I touched the box and it shook crazily. I first thought there were ghosts.

 

[Tdol]

I miss geckos- I am glad to be going back to the tropics soonish, where they will eat bugs that want to give me dengue or malaria.

PS When My hand should be When my hand.

 

[emsr2d2]

I didn’t touch the gecko. I touched the box and it shook crazily. I first thought there were ghosts.

You live in a house where you've already seen geckos, yet your first thought on discovering there was something in a box was that it was a ghost! That's very surprising.

 

[Maybo]

You live in a house where you've already seen geckos, yet your first thought on discovering there was something in a box was that it was a ghost! That's very surprising.

It is because I use the box everyday and it’s on my desk. The geckos usually hide under the wardrobe so I didn’t expect the gecko went up to a high place and somewhere easy to see. The box really shook crazily and almost fell down. It looked exactly like the ghost scene in movies!

 

[Tarheel]

I don't like saying "my hand" did something. It makes it seem like the hand has a mind of its own. (It doesn't.)

 

[emsr2d2]

Instead of making individual corrections/changes to your text, I'm just going to show you how I would write it. You'll note, I'm sure, that the language I use is quite casual, as it usually is in a personal diary.

"There's a few geckos in my house. I'm really scared of them cos they seem to appear out of nowhere and run really fast! Once, I stuck my hand in my stationery box and the box started shaking - there was a gecko hiding in there! It frightened the cr*p out of me - it was as terrifying as that scene in The Exorcist when the girl walks down the stairs like an upside-down crab!
Sometimes, I hear the geckos in the living room and my bedroom. They make a sound like "Coooo, coooo" but when I turn on the light, they go quiet. Summer's approaching and I reckon there'll be a lot more of them around, looking for insects to eat."