describe walking in snow

[alpacinou]

Hello.

How can I describe a person walking in snow? I mean to describe the sound and the footprint it leaves in an interesting way.

 

[Tarheel]

I walk through the snow feeling winter's cold embrace.
The wind is so cold it burns my face.

 

[Tarheel]

As I walk through the icy snow I can hear it crunch beneath my feet.
Right now some hot cocoa would be a wonderful treat.

 

[Charlie Bernstein]

Yup. It's usually called crunching.

 

[probus]

When it's really cold up here in Canada the snow sometimes makes a squeaking sound as you walk on it. You can hear it here:

https://youtu.be/5vTQjfPCQog

 

[Tarheel]

If it's icy snow walking on it will make a crunchy sound. Otherwise, you might make hardly any sound at all. (I have never heard the squeaky sound, but I don't live in Canada.)

 

[Tarheel]

When it's really cold up here in Canada the snow sometimes makes a squeaking sound as you walk on it. You can hear it here:

https://youtu.be/5vTQjfPCQog

I heard something that sounded like a dog. Was that the squeaky sound or an actual dog?

 

[probus]

I don't hear any sound from the dog. When the human wiggles their feet you can hear the squeak clearly. I guess some people would describe the sound of the person's footsteps as a crunch, but trust this Canuck: when it is very cold the snow squeaks.

 

[Tarheel]

It once got to five below zero Fahrenheit in St. Louis, but there was no snow on the ground. No squeak!

 

[emsr2d2]

I walk through the snow, feeling winter's cold embrace.

As I walk through the icy snow, I can hear it crunch beneath my feet.
Right now, some hot cocoa would be a wonderful treat.

When it's really cold up here in Canada, the snow sometimes makes a squeaking sound as you walk on it.

If it's icy snow, walking on it will make a crunchy sound.

When the human wiggles their feet, you can hear the squeak clearly.

I have occasionally been accused of overusing commas but, in my opinion, all the commas in red (which I added) are necessary. I'm genuinely interested to know what other native speakers and teachers think.

 

[alpacinou]

What about this?

Jack was fast asleep in his sleeping bag when a noise woke him up. The crunch of someone walking in the snow got louder. He turned around and saw the footprint on the snow but there was no sign of a person.

 

[emsr2d2]

What about this?

Jack was fast asleep in his sleeping bag when a noise woke him up. The crunch of someone walking in the snow got louder. He turned around and saw [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] a footprint [STRIKE]on[/STRIKE] in the snow but there was no sign of a person.

Note my changes above. I'd end with "... but there was no one in sight".

 

[alpacinou]

Note my changes above. I'd end with "... but there was no one in sight".

Isn't footprint countable?

I found this example in this dictionary:

The child left her tiny footprints in the snow.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/footprint#examples

 

[probus]

Footprint is certainly a countable noun, but Jack only needed to see one to know that someone or something had visited his camp.

 

[alpacinou]

Aha. Does this also work?

Jack was fast asleep in his sleeping bag when a noise woke him up. The crunch of someone walking in the snow got louder. He turned around and saw big footprints on the snow but there was no one in sight.

 

[probus]

As emsr2d2 has pointed out, footprints are in the snow, not on it. Apart from that your passage reads well now. It is mysterious. If you were trying to excite the reader's curiosity I'd say you have succeeded.

 

[Tarheel]

Isn't footprint countable?

I found this example in this dictionary:

The child left her tiny footprints in the snow.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/footprint#examples

Two things. One, yes. Two, you will never see just one footprint.

 

[rodgers white]

I think you are right, though I am not a native speaker or a teacher.

 

[emsr2d2]

Isn't "footprint" countable?

I found this example in this dictionary:

The child left her tiny footprints in the snow.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/footprint#examples

Yes, it is countable. Consequently, either the definite article or the indefinite article can be used before it. I changed "the" to "a" in your original because there had been no previous mention of footprints. I almost changed it to "footprints" because, as Tarheel pointed out, it's unusual to see just one footprint. However, I decided to leave the singular because it was more mysterious.

Aha. Does this also work?

Jack was fast asleep in his sleeping bag when a noise woke him up. The crunch of someone walking in the snow got louder. He turned around and saw big footprints [STRIKE]on[/STRIKE] in the snow but there was no one in sight.

Note my correction above. Please read our corrections carefully. I changed "on" to "in" in my first response. It's disappointing to see you make the same error just a few posts later.

I think you are right, though I am not a native speaker or a teacher.

It's not clear who this is directed to. If you want to respond directly to a particular post, quote it in your response (use the "Reply with Quote" button).

 

[alpacinou]

Note my correction above. Please read our corrections carefully. I changed "on" to "in" in my first response. It's disappointing to see you make the same error just a few posts later.

I did notice your correction and learned it. I'm very incisive when it comes to learning but in terms of typing and copy-pasting to answer here, I could be sloppy.