[Grammar] Correct tenses for the sentence

[cyrusevilming]

Please advise if the sentence in the below is grammatically correct. Thanks.

Even the patients diagnosed with Mers were asked to stay at home at least 2 weeks for separation, they ignored the government’s request, kept joining the activities in public area and lack of relevant information was disseminated to public that resulted in the upsurge of spread of infectious virus.

 

[Rover_KE]

No — it's a mess. Where did you find it? It should be separated into at least two sentences and 'MERS' should be capitalised.

 

[cyrusevilming]

Is it better to be amended as follows? If not, would you please advise your re-written version. Thanks.

Even though the patients who have been diagnosed with MERS were informed to stay at home at least 2 weeks for separation, they ignored the government’s request and kept joining the activities in public area that resulted in the upsurge of spread of contagious virus. Lack of relevant information disseminated by mass media to the public/community was also a part of the causation.

 

[Matthew Wai]

The following is my version, but I am not a teacher.

Although the patients diagnosed with MERS had been asked to stay at home for at least two weeks for separation, they ignored the government’s request and kept joining the activities in public areas, resulting in the rapid spread of the contagious virus.

 

[tedmc]

Although the patients diagnosed with MERS had been asked to stay at home for isolation (infection control) for at least two weeks, they ignored the government’s order (request is non-obligatory) and were out in the public areas, resulting in the rapid spread of the contagious virus. The lack of relevant information disseminated by the mass media (to the public is understood) was also part of the cause of the worsened situation.

 

[Matthew Wai]

the government’s order

Who said it was an order?

 

[Raymott]

"Being asked to stay at home" is not obligatory either.

 

[tedmc]

It is a grim situation with the risk of a dangerous disease spreading being real, so it is hardly plausible for the government to only 'request' patients carrying the deadly virus not to be out in public places, posing a risk to the public.

Yes, 'asking people to comply with health measures' is also too weak in a situation like that.

 

[Matthew Wai]

it is hardly plausible for the government to only 'request'...

I would not make an implausible sentence plausible by distorting its meaning, but I am not a teacher.

 

[Matthew Wai]

the sentence in the below

I would omit 'in the', but I am not a teacher.